Tue-We let ourselves sleep in. Lazily got up, showered and made our way to the water. Asked about getting on the wrong catamaran but eventually found the right one. The crew loved us. Anderson Cooper may or may not have been the driver. I was okay with that. Mai Tais for $3 were awesome and we just chilled on a boat for an hour and a half. The sun was beaming, the people were friendly and we tried to dolphin watch. Probably the best part of the trip.
Then we got picked up by a van and taken to the docks (sounds shady when I say it like that) to go parasailing. There were mo effing humpback whales jumping in the water below us! It was like nothing I had ever seen before. It was kind of exhilarating being able to catch it. The suckers are huge and it was always for just a brief glimpse of them. Very awesome. When Jessica and I were in the air the majority of the time we spent screaming our heads off. She was in front of me instead of behind me which was weird. The wind kept shifting making it feel like the balloon was going to deflate and fall. Science will say it won't happen but it certainly felt like it. Then the boat guys dipped us in the water and when we started screaming they dragged us backwards getting us entirely soaked. It was scary as hell but I'll never forget it. And did I mention that this same company did parasailing for NSYNC? Because they did.
Then we had one more thing planned for the day: Germaine's Luau. They asked all the single people to clap and we were the only ones. Awkward. Then we thought we made friends with cute couple named Steve and Marsha but then he started reading the Bible to her on the bus. Deal breaker. So we got there and were ticked because the drink line was hellza long, we sat on glorified picnic tables, surrounded by couples and the "buffet" was only so so. But they did juggle fire so that was worth it. And why buy the $15 photo when you can just snap a picture of it on the bus?
Another night of Norah Jones to lull us to sleep. Good day.
Wed-Up early to walk to the car rental place. Got Coffee Bean--best decision. That stuff is flonking delicious. The line took an hour. I realized Jessica's sun in made her blonde and made fun of her for how dumb it had made her sound. She lost all ability to spell and I called her out on it. Hilarious. Finally got The Charger and hit the road. First up--flea market at the Aloha Stadium. Well first we actually drove past it because the signage was bad and then stopped at a KFC for directions. I know I'm turing into my dad because I kept gripping about how bad the sinage was in Hawaii. Aye bon. Finally found it but unfortunately everything there was crap. Nothing worth buying. We did get those fried ball things in cinnamon sugar. Mama's had better. (that's what she said) So we hit the road to go to the Dole Plantation. Hence this picture:
Delicious bbq sandwhices, dole pineapple whip (ice cream) and a lot of souvenir shopping. Should have ridden the Pineapple Express but we were too cheap. Then we headed to the North Shore. By the time we finally got there it was raining. Shoot my face off. We still got out and went down to the shore. It was really rocky and rough in the water. Rather terrifying. But I'm sure on a calmer, sunny day I would have loved it. We then said to hell with our written our Google Map and decided to figure out "the long way" back and drive along the coast. And by God we did it! And we saw a rainbow! Very beautiful and nice to just look around the whole island and see the good, the bad and the hibiscus. We loved our first catamaran ride so much that we sprung for the sunset cruise with the same company. This boat was packed and drinks were included so things got crazy. I taught an 80 year old Gerta how to pop and lock to Blame it on the Alcohol and we had her and her daughter Marsha (of no relation to the first Marsha) to sing along to Country Grammar "must be the money." It was probably the hardest I laughed the whole trip. Marsha said that I was worth the price of admission. Why thank you ma'laday. We headed back the Red Lion for a wind down and then back to the hotel. We were exhausted. Norah Jones rocked it out for our last night in that hell den.
It was absolutely breath taking. There was practically no one around. Minus that couple getting their wedding photos. But it was so peaceful and quiet. But also loud and forceful all at the same time. No wonder people buy those stupid wave sound machines to fall asleep to. There's just nothing like it. This was another particular high point. The drive was beautiful. The sun was grand. And we left our names in the sand. Beautiful. We spent the rest of the day at Waikiki soaking up the remaining sun that we could. Late lunch at Dukes. No hula pie because at that point we were full to bursting. We tried to go to a farmer's market but got lost. Caught a sunset hula show and then went to the hotel. Robert's lost our reservation for a ride back but sent a guy to get us. He told us his life story and about his daughter Destiny that'll be born in a few weeks. I think we got invited to her first birthday which is apparently like this huge blow out party on the island. I'm game. He was the best way to end the vacation. A taste of local culture. A man that has only been to the states once and it was on active duty. His whole life is this island and it only takes 2.5 hours to get from one end to the other. How truly amazing.
The red eye plane was hellish and we had a lay over in San Fran. I got back to Seattle at 9am and went straight to work because I'm more robot than human.
I'll never forget this trip, it was something special.
